I Don't Want It!
- Kaila W.
- Feb 16, 2018
- 4 min read
Disclaimer here! If you happen to have your room, office or iPhone plastered with this quote, I TOTALLY get it! I'm not putting it or you down one bit! So, please no haters :) Just saying what's been on my heart!
I'm one of those women that wants to be surrounded by smiles, inspirational quotes, Bible verses and happy pictures everywhere I go. Right now in front of my desk is a wall calendar full of butterflies, 3 encouraging pictures/posts I found online and printed out, 3 inspirational quote/Bible verse writings and a list on how to be more productive. There's 3 other quotes and another Bible verse hanging on the other wall. I need all the help I can get keeping my thoughts where they need to be and my faith strong! My phone wallpaper is constantly changing with quotes, verses or pictures that encourage me in the opposition of whatever I'm facing at the time, or just make me happy. Often you can find me scouring the internet for a picture or reminder that brings a smile to my day. Well, I was looking online at different pictures and wallpapers and came across this very pretty, floral phone wallpaper that read, "You got this." Now, hear my heart, please. I COMPLETELY understand this quote. It's like a pick me up when you're facing something that makes you nervous or frustrated. Take a deep breath, and be reminded that you got this. You'll get through it! I get it. No quote shaming here! But in my mind I'm just thinking, I DON'T WANT IT! I get NO comfort from hearing that "I've got this!" Do you know how many times I'VE decided to handle something myself and I'VE utterly destroyed it? Knowing that I'VE got this brings no confidence to my heart - it actually scares me a little. This, this, "thing", that is so important that I'm needing to take deep breaths and calm myself over it - those are the types of things I don't want any control over! I want God to handle those sorts of things. I want to know that "God's got this!" Which leads me to this - Why do we think we can handle even the simplest of tasks on our own? Why do I think that this tincy wincy little brain of mine that can barely remember to turn my work timesheet in and plan lunch for the week, for the day, can handle challenging situations and matters of the heart? Nowadays we often hear, "Well, how does that make you feel?" Sometimes the answer to that is simple. "I don't know!" There's just so many emotions!
"Maybe sometimes the reason we feel hurt is because our PRIDE is hurt, not necessarily our heart."
The way our hearts work is often a mystery even to us. That's why we need Him. Maybe sometimes the reason we feel hurt is because our PRIDE is hurt, not necessarily our heart. Maybe sometimes we're not so much sad as we are jealous. We see what others have that we'd love to have and it makes us somewhat depressed, which in turn makes us seem sad. When, in reality, it's envy rearing its ugly head. It's important when our feelings have been hurt, that we take these feelings to Jesus. It may simply be that, truly, our heart has been scarred by words said or actions that we still can't wrap our minds around. It hurts deeply. And it's okay to hurt. That happens. When it does there's no better place to go than to the throne of grace where Jesus will wrap you in His arms and start to mend that area of your heart. But, sometimes, as much as I hate to admit it, those feelings also reveal underlying emotions that don't really need have place in our heart. Yet again, no better place to go than the throne of grace where mercy is given to forgive and help us to grow. Aren't you thankful there's grace for EVERY need? All different sorts of grace for all different sorts of needs. I'm thankful for that. Now that we chased that rabbit trail let me get back on subject! When it comes to matters of the heart, matters of this life and the choices that we make, matters of our health and well being, I want to know that ALL of that is placed in the hands of the Lord and HE has it all. Not me. I can't fix things in my strength alone. I can't deal with someone else's heart. I can't give myself favor. I can't heal my body or the body of those I love. I can't make the boss give me a raise. I can't put the plan in place that will make the church grow. I can't find the words that will minister to someone's heart. We can't do any of this on our own, but God can. He can do all of those things and so much more. So, I find sweet comfort in realizing that HE'S got this. My part is obeying, praying, believing, and surrendering it into His hands. There's no better place for any thing to be!
Comments